Chapter 3: Captain Jack

Captain Jack—I thought that before Dan starts telling you all about his life with that pretty wife of his I should tell you about Lt. Dan.

We had met while we were both in the hospital. The doctors had taken out my left eye. They had taken off both his legs below the knees. Maybe you don’t agree with him wanting to drop the bomb but now, maybe, you can understand him wanting to.

I had recently joined the Mississippi Cattlemen’s Association. Their convention was held in Jackson and my wife thought it a good time for me to look at some bulls and for her lay around a pool. So we drove down one afternoon. We had a great meal and decided to tour the exhibits the next morning.

While my wife went to the pool I walked around the exhibits. I saw one with pictures of Angus bulls that seemed to be what I was looking for. I was thinking about using Angus on my commercial herd because I had noticed that steers seemed to sell better if they had some Angus in them. I approached the booth and saw a pretty black girl who was about 6 months pregnant taking care of a little white boy about 3 years old. I asked if the owner of these fine looking bulls was around. I thought she was probably an employee of the farm and was taking care of the baby.

She replied, “I am the owner’s wife. What can I help you with?”

I told her I had about 200 head of commercial cattle and was wondering where I could see some of these bulls in person. About that time Dan walked up.

“Captain Jack!! How the hell have you been?”

I’m fine how are you?

“Not bad, I see you have met my wife, Tina this is Captain Jack, you’ve heard me talk about him.”

“Glad to meet you, and this is his son, my step-son, Brian.”

Brian had been listening to the conversation and sticks his hand out for me to shake. I take it and look at Dan. I guess he saw a question in my eye so he volunteered, “My first wife died from a fall off a horse. Tina was her nurse.” He grins and I say no more about his personal life. I am sure when they meet my wife there will be more questions.

My wife and I spent two nights at his farm and bought 10 of his young bulls. We have been buying and trading bulls back and forth for the past 40 years.

THE END (Of the story)

Author’s Note---I posted this as a true story and it is. I changed the names of course. Did anybody catch the last name I gave Lt. Dan? I also changed the location to Mississippi. When I did that I had to change Amos and Tina’s race from Hispanic to Black. There were not many Mexicans living in Mississippi in the middle ‘60’s. Of course the ‘Captain Jack’ character at the end was me, not my real name.

One last thing. That comment about dropping the bomb was all me. Why carry a ‘big stick’ if you are afraid to use it?

THE RANT

Let’s take 9/11 as an example. We knew with-in hours who planned it and from where. The tallyban had given bin laden sanctuary. (Yeah, I know. I spelled it like I say it and I refuse to give them the respect of capitalizing their names.) Instead of sending in ground troops, who were never welcomed by those woman hating fanatics, just drop the bomb!

What has that part of the world ever donated to mankind? I’ll tell you what, HEROIN! Did you know that at that time Afghanistan produced 90% of the world’s heroin? If that place glowed in the dark for the next 1,000 years the world would be a better place. But what did we do? We installed the brother of the country’s biggest heroin producer as president! Their heroin production increased over 3,000% in the next 5 years as our troops guarded their poppy fields and tried to burn out the competition!

In 2021 the tallyban takes over the country, again. Their “supreme leader” decides drugs are bad. He issues a degree to destroy the poppy fields. According to him in less than two years 99% of the poppy fields are destroyed! They did it using AK-47’s and sticks! What worries the U.S. and the U.K. about this? That the poor poppy farmers might starve with no income from their drug sales! You can’t make this shit up! They are farmers for God’s sake. Plant some beans.